"But He makes everything beautiful in His time."

       I don't know why I am doing it, I guess to just get my feelings out, so it may be very rambling! This is really hard to write as I sit and stare at my empty room, free of all my clothes and basically just boxes shoved under the bed ready to move back home. I cannot even express the thankfulness I have had to live her for a year already. But boy, has it truly flown by waaaaay too fast. I feel like just yesterday I was making the choice to attend here, coming to orientation, meeting my fabulous roomie, introduced my nervous self to my sweet RA (who has now become one of my best friends), meeting the greatest RD ever, and starting life as a baby college freshman.
       Here I stand today almost done. I am hired at an RA next year, I have made the best friends a girl could ask for, I have learn so much about my walk with the Lord with a clear understanding that there is still so much I don't know and am ready to learn. I am going to miss the fun I have had because I know that while next year will be a whole new adventure, there will not be anymore years just like this one-full of its own unique new beginnings and friendships formed, laughs erupting and tears shed, things gained and things lost. I truly cannot imagine leaving the darling souls I have been able to meet and invest time into this year as we all going our own separate ways for the next three months.
       I don't want to leave, but I am trying to focus on the fact that I know my God has beautiful things in store for summer as well. New mission fields that we would not ever encounter if we stayed in the "MC bubble." He makes all things beautiful in its time, we must remember.
      All day today, I have seen parents drive up to load their own grown baby's things, and it makes me heart do a whirlwind of emotional flips. Those parents want their babies home, they miss them. While their are some students here that feel the same way, there are also some, like me, that can't imagine leaving this place for three whole months. Can't I just bring my family here? God has taught me more than I have ever learned in such a short period of time. I don't want to part ways with these souls, wondering how many people here should I have invested time in but didn't. These are ultimately eternal souls, not just aimless bodies. I don't know what home is like. The friends I have I want to keep close to my side and have friend-dates and giggles every day like I am used to. But you see, I know I can't. The Lord has called me to a different place for a few months see find new souls to run towards and share His love, and I will be equipped and prepared....
       Shedding tears is not a bad thing- I have shed many over these realizations as I packed up my dorm, said goodbye to KT seniors the other night, and I know I will shed many, many more over the next few days leaving my sweet dorm neighbors, my RA, my graduating friends, and just others than have impacted my life. But this is not goodbye, and I will say "The longer we are away from each other means less time until we are together again." I have watched other people cry already, and that makes it even harder because they are hurting to leave, too. Especially us freshman who have never experienced this before!
       I thank God for this, and even though this stinks, I know this is exactly how is should be. I would do it all over again in a heartbeat. Here's a song that has truly been my heart for a few weeks now! Yes, it is by Hannah Montana, but the song is beautiful.

"Here we are now
Everything is about to change
We face tomorrow as we say goodbye to yesterday
A chapter ending but the stories only just begun
A page is turning for everyone...So I'm moving on
Letting go
Holding on to tomorrow
I've always got the memories while I'm finding out who I'm gonna be
We might be apart but I hope you always know
You'll be with me wherever I go
Wherever I go.."